bikerBabe is filling my head with LIES about my beloved Garmin saying it's deceiving me on its calorie count. Why would my Garmin lie to me? Anyway she says, "Don't buy into the Garmin's ridiculously high calorie consumption numbers. I'll see if I can find some more realistic numbers."
But I want to buy into the Garmin's ridiculously high calorie consumption numbers bikerBabe!
So bikerBabe kicks out the following, "He (some researcher) found that if you ride at 15 mph, you burn 31 calories per mile. This means if you ride 20 miles you burn 20 x 31 = 620 calories. This was for someone who weighs 155. So your ride would be 31x32 or 992 calories. Maybe more since you weigh a little more."
I weigh a little more huh? bikerBabe is being kind, let's face facts I weigh A LOT more. So I did a little looking of my own and after a bunch of happy babble that sounded like this:
The only way to know how many calories you expended on a ride is to know:
i. the total energy produced propelling yourself along (= average watts x number of seconds riding) expressed in joules (J), which of course requires a power meter.
ii the gross efficiency of your body during the ride (i.e. the ratio of energy expended propelling yourself forward vs the total amount of energy expended by your body, such as heat mostly, energy propelling yourself forward, noise etc)
Since it is almost impossible to measure gross efficiency on a ride (can be done in a lab though) and it varies, then even with a power meter it is still an approximation.
However, the gross efficiency, while it varies, doesn't vary that much, to the extent that the reading from a power meter can be used to estimate calorie consumption with reasonable accuracy (certainly with enough accuracy to manage dietary intake).
By an interesting quirk - the typical gross efficiency of a cyclist is roughly 23-25%, which neatly cancels out the 4.184 joules per calorie, or 4.184 kJ per Calorie.
Hence if your power meter tells you the ride energy output was 1,000 kJ then you can, with reasonable accuracy, know that your total energy expenditure was 1,000 Calories.
Well of course, everyone knows that - sheesh! I'm now figuring I need a 'power meter' - why everyone and their brother decided to keep Bill in the dark about THAT is a mystery but OK, you had your fun - so I find out that most real bikers (such as myself) prefer the Power Tap and honestly having another device on my overcrowded handlebars would be... cool!!! OK I'm in! Maybe I can just upgrade my bike computer a few steps up to the 'power meter' option. Let's lookie! I'll want the coolest one of course...
2009 Cycleops Power Tap SLC+ Wireless Hub
$2,099.99??!!! Well it does have ceramic bearings... WHAT AM I THINKING?
Maybe you should buy it for me - yes YOU! Awwwww come on!
So I guess what I'll do is wing the whole calorie thing and subtract maybe five or six calories off of what the Garmin says and be done with it. Yeah, that should work.
I rode the bike in today, very pleasant. Burned 180 calories on that fifteen minute jaunt.
I start a tempo workout on the upright bike and IronMan comes in and lounges on a recumbent next to me. I'm blaring some music in my ears since the place is Rave central at the moment and I can sorta hear him. I'm in a dilemma because I just don't want to take the ear buds out but I do want to yak with IronMan who's babbling about his father or father-in-law just got a new ride with that cars for clunkers thing.
I sit up from my sweaty suffering and put on my glasses as a shadowy form enters the trainers office.
"Bubbles here?" queries IronMan.
"I don't think it was her."
Has Bubbles died and they're trying to pawn of a fake Bubbles, figuring we're too oxygen deprived to notice?
It's definitely not Bubbles, she goes over to the desk and sits behind it in the classic substitute teacher pose of "I don't know you but I'm watching you so don't irk me!"
Hmmmm. Well my vast readership will want to know...
I wrap up my thirty on the bike, head on over there and introduce myself. Since I can't think of a name for her I'll refer to her in the third person. She's actually quite nice and very personable.
I'm immediately suspicious! The nice ones you have to keep an eye on.
Apparently Bubbles is on vacation, she must have cleared it with the prodigious gym collective, though she didn't clear it with me. I recall now that there's a pilates class today instead of ABS and yep she's teaching it.
I ask her about this 'pilates' thing.
"Well it's all about the core, strengthening it and elongating it."
Upticks my interest - perk
"It also works the lower back..."
Perk!
"and helps you shed weight."
PERK! Hello sailor!
Eying the placement of some machines she hops on one and shows me a basic pilates position which reminds me of Lamaze with all the breathing.
Seems simple enough."Hmmmm," I say spotting Kojak on a nearby elliptical, "Kojak always said pilates was a wimpy 'girl' exercise. Hey Kojak, are you taking the pilates class today?"
Kojak nods affirmative and the nice trainer girl looks at him speculatively.
Having finished Bubbles ABS routine and hopefully 'enhanced' Kojak's upcoming pilates class it was time for me to go.
Lightening crackled and storm clouds gathered as I slowly pedeled my bike over to the other building. If Kojak is suffering then it was worth it :-)
See ya next time!
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