IronMan Vows to Become WimpyMan!!! Plus a comment from a spinner!

"You know like 'Wimpy' from the old Popeye cartoons? I do love my bacon triple cheeseburgers," said WimpyMan er IronMan when reached in his secret lair known only as 'The Bed.' Polishing off the burger The Athlete Formally Known as IronMan daintily began eating a series of six White Castle cheeseburgers while sipping from a large chocolate milkshake, "I eat the 'sliders' to flush out the system, you know, keep things moving along," he explains while motioning JRock to fan him harder.

"Honestly, I could get use to this," he sighs before 'allowing' WickedWoman to change the channel on the 54 inch flatscreen he had installed at the foot of his bed. "I'm afraid you have to go, my stories are coming on."

I haven't seen IronMan in about a week. I'm not certain why he's not about so I'm going to make up a bunch of stuff until he decides to drag his butt back into the gym. Since this is a blog and therefor a form of the written word I expect that these meandering tales and outright distortions of truth will shortly become fact in the gym rats minds and a rescue party will be deployed.

IronMan, it is time to stop hitting the snooze button, the BOSU ball misses you.

goodMood beat me in today. While I was chatting it up and casually working through my routine he was pounding through it like a possessed work-a-holic. I stupidly signed up for the lose weight over the holidays thing the gym is doing. I think it starts on Monday. I clocked in on the gym scale at 207 and on the locker scale at 205 so my clothes apparently weigh a lot!

I was trying to make my loss a bit more significant by adding ankle weights and when Bubbles spotted that I shoved in a few three pound dumbbells into my socks.

Bubbles spotted those too.

sigh

She was asking me all sorts of nonsense about goals and whatnot. My goal is not to put on weight and that's it.

OH! OH! I just got this in the comments and had to share it with you so it won't be missed (I don't get many comments! I made some slight changes for readability)

So you've seen the dark room full of Under Armour-clad bodies pedaling furiously, channeling Lance Armstrong while they cycle to techno-infused music. Or caught a whiff when they exited class, looking as if they had jumped into a pool with their clothes on. And you've thought: No way am I getting within a five-foot radius of indoor cycling class. 

I know how it is. But don't be put off -- really.

As a cycling instructor, I have seen lots of people -- from exercise newbies to gym regulars -- hesitantly climb on a bike and start pedaling, then proudly walk up to me after their first class and report that it was not the torture session they had anticipated. In fact, they actually enjoyed it.

Indoor cycling, pioneered by ultra-endurance athlete Jonathan Goldberg in the late '80s under the trademarked name Spinning, was originally created to serve the winter training needs of cyclists and people looking for a non-impact cardiovascular alternative to the treadmill and elliptical machine.

So why all the fear?

Indoor cycling is mysterious; people don't have a lot of awareness about what exactly it entails. People think that because the exercise session is on a bike, it is only for fit people or elite cyclists, but that is not true.

Cycling is about attaining and achieving fitness, working at a good aerobic pace, not walking out and thinking, damn, that was so hard!

Even though cycling is classified as a group fitness class, participants control a session's intensity more than they do in step or aerobics classes that involve lots of choreography.

Classes typically last 50 minutes, cover 15 to 20 miles and burn 500 calories or more while engaging the major leg muscles and the core. By adjusting the resistance knob attached to the brake at the front of the bike, you can tailor the class to your fitness level or mimic climbing hills or sprinting on flat roads.

Your first and only goal was to stay on the bike

I offer the following tips for newcomers to indoor cycling:

• Get to class about 15 minutes early so the instructor can set you up on the bike, explain safety cues.
• Even though cycling is non-impact, you can injure your knees and back if you are not fitted properly. If the instructor does not give you special attention, leave and find another instructor.
• Bring a full water bottle, a towel and lightweight clothing. Avoid wearing long pants, especially those with flared legs that could get caught in the pedal spindles. Ordinary sneakers are fine.
• Don't feel compelled to keep up with the instructor or other participants. Use your first class to play around with the resistance and watch how the class is conducted.

Bill's newest "handler" Bill the spinning instructor!

Thanks Bill!!!