Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Monday, November 30, 2009
Back to it
I gave you an earful yesterday so I'll just mention that I was in the gym today along with awesomeGirl, goodMood and ponyTail. Even MarathonMan was there but no IronMan :-(
I did the interval thing along with some ABS and listened to ponyTail's plans to turn her house into a second sun using Christmas lights.
"You'll be able to see my house from space!"
Sunday, November 29, 2009
The Ass is the First to Go
Oh my, where to begin? You guys should know by now for me, at this moment in my life it's all about the bike. Well biking anyway, I don't know why but I do loveth it so. So I made plans to purchase a serious (by most standards) road bike in the spring of 2010, a Modone 4.7 to be precise.
bikerBabe blew that out of the water with one ad.
$700 dollars off the bike I wanted was just too good a deal to pass up, the problem was it wasn't Black Friday, it was Thanksgiving and I was strolling through a park with my dad, wife and son on some sort of weird power-walk turkey trot sort of thing in a vain attempt to pay Thanksgiving dinner forward.
I was thinking about 'the hill.' Obsessing about it. I wanted to know if I could take it on the new bike I didn't yet have. I was pretty sure I could take it, but how fast? It's about eight tenths of a mile of pure pain. There are a lot of these nightmares around my fathers house, mile long thigh crushers. The major problem being they were not bike friendly, thin twisty horrors where you could get nailed by a car even if you were careful. This one looked like this:
And after you rounded the bend at the top of the above picture looked like this:
And don't let the top of the hill fool you, it goes somewhat flat and then up you go again before hitting a series of nasty rollers. To the Garmin it looked like this (shown until my dad rescued my son and I in the car):
While my son and I were trudging up the hill the Garmin was spitting out fun numbers like 24% grade but generally hung out around 17%. I have to try it this summer. So that's two little promises, this hill and a century. Weeeee!
Wednesday, before heading to my folks I was in the gym doing the interval thing. awesomeGirl and goodMood were there too but alas no IronMan. The reason I'm tossing this out in a non sequitur sort of way is because I was fairly active over this Holiday and I'll be curious about my weight on Monday. Also to let IronMan know that I've still got an eye on him.
There's no escaping IronBill's baleful glare! Do you hear me IronMan?!
Um, yeah, that should cover it.
So Black Friday rolled around and I had to get up at 4:30am to drag my son to a nearby store so that he could get this XBox he'd been wanting. He actually earned the coin for it but the place was a zoo and I thank the everlasting Lord that he didn't want a Wii, we'd still be in line. Then we headed back home so I could purchase Precious, er, the bike.
Precious is going to be something of a icon for me. It is the culmination of nearly a year's work and hopefully something I will enjoy for the next decade. I honestly can't wait until I can put some serious miles on it.
Wanna see?
By the time it was purchased and configured and all that jazz it was too late to ride, but I'm pretty proud of it and what it means to me, my current accomplishments.
Saturday rolled around and I found myself in spin class with my wife and son. I don't know why. My wife was spin curious, my daughter was not so opted for the pool and my son decided to give it a whirl. We got there about fifteen minutes before class (late) and when we got in there all the shiny new bikes were taken so we got out the old ones and set up. I could not get my bike sized correctly and that made me cranky but by the time I got the straps for the cages correct it was time to spin.
This was a markedly different course than the one I took from Bill. First I was positioned poorly, right at the focal point of the two blaring speakers emanating all sorts of spin music. The instructor opted for those McDonalds Can I Take Your Order headsets spewed a bunch of unintelligible mush from them.
"OK, I want you to muwha mus offne mumble mumble. But it's critical that you mushmouth mutter gibberish!"
Effectively it boiled down to keeping your eye on her and when she stood up, I stood up, when she pedaled fast, I pedaled fast. Towards the end of the class the music began to drive notes into my ears like railroad spikes and I ended up shoving my fingers into my ears trying to quiet things down a bit. About midway through the class my wife hopped off her bike and just left, the pansy! She went and checked on our daughter rolls eyes but came back in to finish up after her massage and latte.
It was a pretty good class, sorta. I mean I got a good workout with a maxHR of 154 (77%) and an average HR of 137 for fifty four minutes but the one thing I took away from it was:
And then I took Precious out that afternoon for a very small jaunt, three miles. It was interesting 'clipping in' and playing around with the new shifters. It was also fairly cold.
Today (Sunday) I just had to attempt something a little more fun; however it was windy as all get out. So I bundled up and put on a windbreaker and headed out for a jaunt around a local park. The total ride was eleven and a half miles, the 7.71 was actually on the bike trail which only had three stop signs on it. There was a fair amount of pedestrians on the path but it looks like the bike has added about 2mph on what I normally do. The last time I did the park I averaged 12.7mph, this time it was 14.8.
I'm already out of shape for biking, my butt hurt and it felt like I had too much weight on my hands. Both of these issues can be solved by riding more and some tinkering. I am DYING to get out on a seriously long ride, which will be spring I guess. Until then I'm going to have to master the art of cleating in and out of the pedals. There's so much to learn - I LOVE this bike and lifestyle!
Happy Thanksgiving!
bikerBabe blew that out of the water with one ad.
$700 dollars off the bike I wanted was just too good a deal to pass up, the problem was it wasn't Black Friday, it was Thanksgiving and I was strolling through a park with my dad, wife and son on some sort of weird power-walk turkey trot sort of thing in a vain attempt to pay Thanksgiving dinner forward.
I was thinking about 'the hill.' Obsessing about it. I wanted to know if I could take it on the new bike I didn't yet have. I was pretty sure I could take it, but how fast? It's about eight tenths of a mile of pure pain. There are a lot of these nightmares around my fathers house, mile long thigh crushers. The major problem being they were not bike friendly, thin twisty horrors where you could get nailed by a car even if you were careful. This one looked like this:
And after you rounded the bend at the top of the above picture looked like this:
And don't let the top of the hill fool you, it goes somewhat flat and then up you go again before hitting a series of nasty rollers. To the Garmin it looked like this (shown until my dad rescued my son and I in the car):
While my son and I were trudging up the hill the Garmin was spitting out fun numbers like 24% grade but generally hung out around 17%. I have to try it this summer. So that's two little promises, this hill and a century. Weeeee!
Wednesday, before heading to my folks I was in the gym doing the interval thing. awesomeGirl and goodMood were there too but alas no IronMan. The reason I'm tossing this out in a non sequitur sort of way is because I was fairly active over this Holiday and I'll be curious about my weight on Monday. Also to let IronMan know that I've still got an eye on him.
There's no escaping IronBill's baleful glare! Do you hear me IronMan?!
Um, yeah, that should cover it.
So Black Friday rolled around and I had to get up at 4:30am to drag my son to a nearby store so that he could get this XBox he'd been wanting. He actually earned the coin for it but the place was a zoo and I thank the everlasting Lord that he didn't want a Wii, we'd still be in line. Then we headed back home so I could purchase Precious, er, the bike.
Precious is going to be something of a icon for me. It is the culmination of nearly a year's work and hopefully something I will enjoy for the next decade. I honestly can't wait until I can put some serious miles on it.
Wanna see?
By the time it was purchased and configured and all that jazz it was too late to ride, but I'm pretty proud of it and what it means to me, my current accomplishments.
Saturday rolled around and I found myself in spin class with my wife and son. I don't know why. My wife was spin curious, my daughter was not so opted for the pool and my son decided to give it a whirl. We got there about fifteen minutes before class (late) and when we got in there all the shiny new bikes were taken so we got out the old ones and set up. I could not get my bike sized correctly and that made me cranky but by the time I got the straps for the cages correct it was time to spin.
This was a markedly different course than the one I took from Bill. First I was positioned poorly, right at the focal point of the two blaring speakers emanating all sorts of spin music. The instructor opted for those McDonalds Can I Take Your Order headsets spewed a bunch of unintelligible mush from them.
"OK, I want you to muwha mus offne mumble mumble. But it's critical that you mushmouth mutter gibberish!"
Effectively it boiled down to keeping your eye on her and when she stood up, I stood up, when she pedaled fast, I pedaled fast. Towards the end of the class the music began to drive notes into my ears like railroad spikes and I ended up shoving my fingers into my ears trying to quiet things down a bit. About midway through the class my wife hopped off her bike and just left, the pansy! She went and checked on our daughter rolls eyes but came back in to finish up after her massage and latte.
It was a pretty good class, sorta. I mean I got a good workout with a maxHR of 154 (77%) and an average HR of 137 for fifty four minutes but the one thing I took away from it was:
Get to spin class early enough to get a good bike location and bike.
And then I took Precious out that afternoon for a very small jaunt, three miles. It was interesting 'clipping in' and playing around with the new shifters. It was also fairly cold.
Today (Sunday) I just had to attempt something a little more fun; however it was windy as all get out. So I bundled up and put on a windbreaker and headed out for a jaunt around a local park. The total ride was eleven and a half miles, the 7.71 was actually on the bike trail which only had three stop signs on it. There was a fair amount of pedestrians on the path but it looks like the bike has added about 2mph on what I normally do. The last time I did the park I averaged 12.7mph, this time it was 14.8.
I'm already out of shape for biking, my butt hurt and it felt like I had too much weight on my hands. Both of these issues can be solved by riding more and some tinkering. I am DYING to get out on a seriously long ride, which will be spring I guess. Until then I'm going to have to master the art of cleating in and out of the pedals. There's so much to learn - I LOVE this bike and lifestyle!
Happy Thanksgiving!
Be seeing you.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Wicked Worms
wickedWoman sends me a URL titled, 'Spoonful of Sugar' Makes The Worms' Lifespan Go Down. I had no idea wickedWoman had worms! She hides her hellish affliction with such stoic grace that truly inspires me! Maybe I can write some tragic novel about her and make a bundle on the movie rights. I'll have to find out how she got worms, the poor dear. Probably poor diet choices like too much asparagus. We eat crap for a reason wickedWoman!
So there you have it, medical proof that a death doughnut a week will keep the worms away! If only wormyWoman had listened! OH! I probably shouldn't call her that, she might not have succumbed to her awful worms yet. I really hope she can clear this malady up so I don't have to name her wormyWoman. That would make me sad, so very sad. But I can tell the worms are already effecting her mind, making her say things like, "Stop eating sugar!" and "Death Doughnuts cause worms!" so that her worm infestation might live.
On other fronts, I had an 'ok' workout today. IronMan showed up Death Doughnutless illustrating that he might have purged the dark sausage. goodMood, awesomeGirl and AT Everest were there along with evil Bubbles, evilBubbles you say?
mmhmm
With her sidekick darkIronman. Obviously he's not entirely free of the dark sausage scourge.
I'm standing on one of those aerobic step thingies, surveying the gym, feeling somewhat slightly godlike from the endorphins and definitely minding my own business! When darkIronman plops a BOSU ball down in front of me. What could I do with such a challenge to my masculinity?
Naturally I had to do a lunge on it.
evilBubbles' head snaps up from the trainers desk like a targeting radar coming online. She begins issuing commands like a demonic drill sergeant before coming over for a closer looksee, "Suck that bellybutton in! Don't bend over! Keep your back straight! I said, 'Place the arch of your foot on the center of the ball!' sheesh!"
So now I'm doing a front lunge off the step onto the BOSU and then shoving off the BOSU back onto the step.
"I'll give that one an 8.5," she says, slightly mollified, and then goes all introspective when I shove off the ball too hard forcing the leg I shoved off with to go over the step into a back lunge position so that I could keep my balance.
She thinks I'm onto something, "Do it again."
So now I'm doing a front lunge onto a BOSU ball, pushing off that into a back lunge before coming up on the step and doing a 3/4 squat.
'One' is doing the lunges on both legs. evilBubbles is back at her desk keeping an eye on me while I learn this new nightmare. It's a lot like surfing when you plant a foot on the BOSU and you're slightly off balance. I had both arms out, fighting for balance.
From across the room evilBubbles calls out, "How many fingers am I holding up?" before snapping her hand out of sight.
"None."
"Five! I was holding five fingers up."
"But then you put your hand down!" I called out while going all wobbly on the ball.
"You need to keep your head up and focus on a distant point. It will help with your balance."
I go all whiny, "But how will I make sure 'the arch of my foot is on the center of the ball' huh? HUH?" pleased with my genius.
evilBubbles sighs, "OK, first make sure you step on the center of the ball AND THEN look up and focus on a distant point. How many fingers am I holding up?"
"One... BUBBLES!"
I could do about three before getting too wobbly, so my pals darkIronman and goodMood thought it would be a good idea to add dumbbells (eight pounders) for 'balance.' I did around two or three more and headed for the lockers.
A fun day at the gym!
PS: send all donations to:
Save wormyWoman c/o Bill at this blog.
Thanks!
So there you have it, medical proof that a death doughnut a week will keep the worms away! If only wormyWoman had listened! OH! I probably shouldn't call her that, she might not have succumbed to her awful worms yet. I really hope she can clear this malady up so I don't have to name her wormyWoman. That would make me sad, so very sad. But I can tell the worms are already effecting her mind, making her say things like, "Stop eating sugar!" and "Death Doughnuts cause worms!" so that her worm infestation might live.
On other fronts, I had an 'ok' workout today. IronMan showed up Death Doughnutless illustrating that he might have purged the dark sausage. goodMood, awesomeGirl and AT Everest were there along with evil Bubbles, evilBubbles you say?
mmhmm
With her sidekick darkIronman. Obviously he's not entirely free of the dark sausage scourge.
I'm standing on one of those aerobic step thingies, surveying the gym, feeling somewhat slightly godlike from the endorphins and definitely minding my own business! When darkIronman plops a BOSU ball down in front of me. What could I do with such a challenge to my masculinity?
Naturally I had to do a lunge on it.
evilBubbles' head snaps up from the trainers desk like a targeting radar coming online. She begins issuing commands like a demonic drill sergeant before coming over for a closer looksee, "Suck that bellybutton in! Don't bend over! Keep your back straight! I said, 'Place the arch of your foot on the center of the ball!' sheesh!"
So now I'm doing a front lunge off the step onto the BOSU and then shoving off the BOSU back onto the step.
"I'll give that one an 8.5," she says, slightly mollified, and then goes all introspective when I shove off the ball too hard forcing the leg I shoved off with to go over the step into a back lunge position so that I could keep my balance.
She thinks I'm onto something, "Do it again."
So now I'm doing a front lunge onto a BOSU ball, pushing off that into a back lunge before coming up on the step and doing a 3/4 squat.
'One' is doing the lunges on both legs. evilBubbles is back at her desk keeping an eye on me while I learn this new nightmare. It's a lot like surfing when you plant a foot on the BOSU and you're slightly off balance. I had both arms out, fighting for balance.
From across the room evilBubbles calls out, "How many fingers am I holding up?" before snapping her hand out of sight.
"None."
"Five! I was holding five fingers up."
"But then you put your hand down!" I called out while going all wobbly on the ball.
"You need to keep your head up and focus on a distant point. It will help with your balance."
I go all whiny, "But how will I make sure 'the arch of my foot is on the center of the ball' huh? HUH?" pleased with my genius.
evilBubbles sighs, "OK, first make sure you step on the center of the ball AND THEN look up and focus on a distant point. How many fingers am I holding up?"
"One... BUBBLES!"
I could do about three before getting too wobbly, so my pals darkIronman and goodMood thought it would be a good idea to add dumbbells (eight pounders) for 'balance.' I did around two or three more and headed for the lockers.
A fun day at the gym!
PS: send all donations to:
Save wormyWoman c/o Bill at this blog.
Thanks!
Monday, November 23, 2009
The Path to Righteousness
The offering is laid before my magnificent feet as DarkIronman grovels for forgiveness, "IronBill I have expunged the dark sausage and beg forgiveness!"
With fiery eyes I gaze down upon the meager benefaction, "And what have you brought forth as penance for thy many, many so very many crimes DarkIronman?"
"Death Doughnuts! A lot of them!"
Hmmm, something of a mixed message I muse, my mind racing at nearly normal speed (look it's early in the morning here - 'k?!) I lock in on a plan that might save my life!
I shriek, "I AM NOT APPEASED!!!"
"But half of the death doughnuts are cream filled... I mean I couldn't get all of them cream filled with the economy being what it is!"
Good point but I certainly can't let him know that. Still even one of those doughnuts might help me in getting out of the doghouse. I managed that by forgetting to turn off the alarm this morning having woken up early. So imagine my 'dead Bill walking' expression as I'm strolling about the house with my morning cup of joe and that bad boy went off, "BEEP BEEP BEEP." Once I recognized it, that klaxon sent me sprinting into the bedroom whispering, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry..." over and over while I turned the alarm off.
The huddled shape, buried under covers muttered back, "You're dead."
Recalling that horror I stare balefully down on DarkIronman, "You know what you must do..."
He looks at me blankly before it dawns on him, "No... noooooooo.... it's been a week, I can't!"
"Yessssss, YOU MUST EXERCISE!!!"
Sullenly picking up the box of Krispy Death Doughnuts DarkIronman heads for the gym.
In a fit of spite I call out, "Every day this week!"
"Every day?! Even Thursday?"
Well it is a Holiday, "OK all you have to do on Thursday is bear crawl to the fridge anytime you want to eat."
It will take awhile for the healing to begin but I'm pretty sure DarkIronman will shortly be the IronMan we all know and love. Still there are remnants of DarkIronman peering out. For example he queried a bit too deeply about my holiday plans scheming on days he could blow off at Bob Evans no doubt. So help me help him, I'll particularly rely on JRock on Thanksgiving Day to make sure his form is correct on the bear crawls (upright is considered bad form); I think she'll like that.
On the way to work I leave a cream filled death doughnut on my wife's desk. Thanks for the Death Doughnuts DarkIronman!
Pray for me and then DarkIronman, in that order and...
Have a great day!
With fiery eyes I gaze down upon the meager benefaction, "And what have you brought forth as penance for thy many, many so very many crimes DarkIronman?"
"Death Doughnuts! A lot of them!"
Hmmm, something of a mixed message I muse, my mind racing at nearly normal speed (look it's early in the morning here - 'k?!) I lock in on a plan that might save my life!
I shriek, "I AM NOT APPEASED!!!"
"But half of the death doughnuts are cream filled... I mean I couldn't get all of them cream filled with the economy being what it is!"
Good point but I certainly can't let him know that. Still even one of those doughnuts might help me in getting out of the doghouse. I managed that by forgetting to turn off the alarm this morning having woken up early. So imagine my 'dead Bill walking' expression as I'm strolling about the house with my morning cup of joe and that bad boy went off, "BEEP BEEP BEEP." Once I recognized it, that klaxon sent me sprinting into the bedroom whispering, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry..." over and over while I turned the alarm off.
The huddled shape, buried under covers muttered back, "You're dead."
Recalling that horror I stare balefully down on DarkIronman, "You know what you must do..."
He looks at me blankly before it dawns on him, "No... noooooooo.... it's been a week, I can't!"
"Yessssss, YOU MUST EXERCISE!!!"
Sullenly picking up the box of Krispy Death Doughnuts DarkIronman heads for the gym.
In a fit of spite I call out, "Every day this week!"
"Every day?! Even Thursday?"
Well it is a Holiday, "OK all you have to do on Thursday is bear crawl to the fridge anytime you want to eat."
It will take awhile for the healing to begin but I'm pretty sure DarkIronman will shortly be the IronMan we all know and love. Still there are remnants of DarkIronman peering out. For example he queried a bit too deeply about my holiday plans scheming on days he could blow off at Bob Evans no doubt. So help me help him, I'll particularly rely on JRock on Thanksgiving Day to make sure his form is correct on the bear crawls (upright is considered bad form); I think she'll like that.
On the way to work I leave a cream filled death doughnut on my wife's desk. Thanks for the Death Doughnuts DarkIronman!
Pray for me and then DarkIronman, in that order and...
Have a great day!
Friday, November 20, 2009
The Fall of IronMan
I listen to the litany of feeble excuses with dubious ears. I'm told by JRock that WimpyMan, er IronMan is dealing with work issues and believe you me I can follow that but I saw JRock this morning and apparently IronMan decided that baking was more important exercise. She confirmed he was in a maid's outfit humming Miley Cyrus hits while baking his buttered tarts or whatever it was and that all sorts of greasy food was being consumed.
A single tear rolled down my cheek.
I hate to say it but... but... IronMan has gone over to... The Sausage Side!!! and has become DarkIronMan.
Since I know none of you have the will or the sheer brainlessness to oppose DarkIronMan I'm guessing you're looking to someone stupid enough to create a nonexistent problem and then address it in a fit of irresponsibility and even though the federal government comes to mind I'm thinking someone closer to the problem otherwise it'll take decades to clear the bureaucracy.
ponyTail? Nah, she's far too logical, and goodMood and awesomeGirl suffer from the same 'logic' malady.
That leaves... ME!
Yesssss I feel the transformation occurring. Only Bill can challenge DarkIronMan and his lethargic sausage eating ways and oppose him! I alone shall stand as a shining beacon of goodness and all that is right with the gym rat way of life! I SHALL BECOME A VERITABLE ICON OF DIETARY HOLINESS (well except for ice cream and death doughnuts of course, I mean lets not get carried away here, maybe cookies... buttered popcorn at the movies, we're not savages - where was I? Oh yeah...)
AND LIKE A HIGH PRIEST SHOULD DARKIRONMAN EVER SET FOOT IN THE GYM AGAIN I SHALL BATTLE HIM UNTIL HE REPENTS AND CASTS THE DARK SAUSAGE FROM HIS BOWELS!!!
But not in the gym, the casting out of the dark sausage should only occur in the potty... alone, I mean I don't want to be around when that happens. I'll trust him if he says he's cast out the dark sausage, good enough for me. I'll take a waver on that whole trust but verify thing.
YESSSSSSSS I FEEEEEL IT - I ACCEPT MY DESTINY
TREMBLE WITH FEAR DARKIRONMAN AND...
A single tear rolled down my cheek.
I hate to say it but... but... IronMan has gone over to... The Sausage Side!!! and has become DarkIronMan.
Since I know none of you have the will or the sheer brainlessness to oppose DarkIronMan I'm guessing you're looking to someone stupid enough to create a nonexistent problem and then address it in a fit of irresponsibility and even though the federal government comes to mind I'm thinking someone closer to the problem otherwise it'll take decades to clear the bureaucracy.
ponyTail? Nah, she's far too logical, and goodMood and awesomeGirl suffer from the same 'logic' malady.
That leaves... ME!
Yesssss I feel the transformation occurring. Only Bill can challenge DarkIronMan and his lethargic sausage eating ways and oppose him! I alone shall stand as a shining beacon of goodness and all that is right with the gym rat way of life! I SHALL BECOME A VERITABLE ICON OF DIETARY HOLINESS (well except for ice cream and death doughnuts of course, I mean lets not get carried away here, maybe cookies... buttered popcorn at the movies, we're not savages - where was I? Oh yeah...)
AND LIKE A HIGH PRIEST SHOULD DARKIRONMAN EVER SET FOOT IN THE GYM AGAIN I SHALL BATTLE HIM UNTIL HE REPENTS AND CASTS THE DARK SAUSAGE FROM HIS BOWELS!!!
But not in the gym, the casting out of the dark sausage should only occur in the potty... alone, I mean I don't want to be around when that happens. I'll trust him if he says he's cast out the dark sausage, good enough for me. I'll take a waver on that whole trust but verify thing.
YESSSSSSSS I FEEEEEL IT - I ACCEPT MY DESTINY
TREMBLE WITH FEAR DARKIRONMAN AND...
BEHOLD YOUR NEMESIS...
Thursday, November 19, 2009
IronMan Vows to Become WimpyMan!!! Plus a comment from a spinner!
"You know like 'Wimpy' from the old Popeye cartoons? I do love my bacon triple cheeseburgers," said WimpyMan er IronMan when reached in his secret lair known only as 'The Bed.' Polishing off the burger The Athlete Formally Known as IronMan daintily began eating a series of six White Castle cheeseburgers while sipping from a large chocolate milkshake, "I eat the 'sliders' to flush out the system, you know, keep things moving along," he explains while motioning JRock to fan him harder.
"Honestly, I could get use to this," he sighs before 'allowing' WickedWoman to change the channel on the 54 inch flatscreen he had installed at the foot of his bed. "I'm afraid you have to go, my stories are coming on."
I haven't seen IronMan in about a week. I'm not certain why he's not about so I'm going to make up a bunch of stuff until he decides to drag his butt back into the gym. Since this is a blog and therefor a form of the written word I expect that these meandering tales and outright distortions of truth will shortly become fact in the gym rats minds and a rescue party will be deployed.
IronMan, it is time to stop hitting the snooze button, the BOSU ball misses you.
goodMood beat me in today. While I was chatting it up and casually working through my routine he was pounding through it like a possessed work-a-holic. I stupidly signed up for the lose weight over the holidays thing the gym is doing. I think it starts on Monday. I clocked in on the gym scale at 207 and on the locker scale at 205 so my clothes apparently weigh a lot!
I was trying to make my loss a bit more significant by adding ankle weights and when Bubbles spotted that I shoved in a few three pound dumbbells into my socks.
Bubbles spotted those too.
sigh
She was asking me all sorts of nonsense about goals and whatnot. My goal is not to put on weight and that's it.
OH! OH! I just got this in the comments and had to share it with you so it won't be missed (I don't get many comments! I made some slight changes for readability)
So you've seen the dark room full of Under Armour-clad bodies pedaling furiously, channeling Lance Armstrong while they cycle to techno-infused music. Or caught a whiff when they exited class, looking as if they had jumped into a pool with their clothes on. And you've thought: No way am I getting within a five-foot radius of indoor cycling class.
I know how it is. But don't be put off -- really.
As a cycling instructor, I have seen lots of people -- from exercise newbies to gym regulars -- hesitantly climb on a bike and start pedaling, then proudly walk up to me after their first class and report that it was not the torture session they had anticipated. In fact, they actually enjoyed it.
Indoor cycling, pioneered by ultra-endurance athlete Jonathan Goldberg in the late '80s under the trademarked name Spinning, was originally created to serve the winter training needs of cyclists and people looking for a non-impact cardiovascular alternative to the treadmill and elliptical machine.
So why all the fear?
Indoor cycling is mysterious; people don't have a lot of awareness about what exactly it entails. People think that because the exercise session is on a bike, it is only for fit people or elite cyclists, but that is not true.
Cycling is about attaining and achieving fitness, working at a good aerobic pace, not walking out and thinking, damn, that was so hard!
Even though cycling is classified as a group fitness class, participants control a session's intensity more than they do in step or aerobics classes that involve lots of choreography.
Classes typically last 50 minutes, cover 15 to 20 miles and burn 500 calories or more while engaging the major leg muscles and the core. By adjusting the resistance knob attached to the brake at the front of the bike, you can tailor the class to your fitness level or mimic climbing hills or sprinting on flat roads.
Your first and only goal was to stay on the bike
I offer the following tips for newcomers to indoor cycling:
Thanks Bill!!!
"Honestly, I could get use to this," he sighs before 'allowing' WickedWoman to change the channel on the 54 inch flatscreen he had installed at the foot of his bed. "I'm afraid you have to go, my stories are coming on."
I haven't seen IronMan in about a week. I'm not certain why he's not about so I'm going to make up a bunch of stuff until he decides to drag his butt back into the gym. Since this is a blog and therefor a form of the written word I expect that these meandering tales and outright distortions of truth will shortly become fact in the gym rats minds and a rescue party will be deployed.
IronMan, it is time to stop hitting the snooze button, the BOSU ball misses you.
goodMood beat me in today. While I was chatting it up and casually working through my routine he was pounding through it like a possessed work-a-holic. I stupidly signed up for the lose weight over the holidays thing the gym is doing. I think it starts on Monday. I clocked in on the gym scale at 207 and on the locker scale at 205 so my clothes apparently weigh a lot!
I was trying to make my loss a bit more significant by adding ankle weights and when Bubbles spotted that I shoved in a few three pound dumbbells into my socks.
Bubbles spotted those too.
sigh
She was asking me all sorts of nonsense about goals and whatnot. My goal is not to put on weight and that's it.
OH! OH! I just got this in the comments and had to share it with you so it won't be missed (I don't get many comments! I made some slight changes for readability)
So you've seen the dark room full of Under Armour-clad bodies pedaling furiously, channeling Lance Armstrong while they cycle to techno-infused music. Or caught a whiff when they exited class, looking as if they had jumped into a pool with their clothes on. And you've thought: No way am I getting within a five-foot radius of indoor cycling class.
I know how it is. But don't be put off -- really.
As a cycling instructor, I have seen lots of people -- from exercise newbies to gym regulars -- hesitantly climb on a bike and start pedaling, then proudly walk up to me after their first class and report that it was not the torture session they had anticipated. In fact, they actually enjoyed it.
Indoor cycling, pioneered by ultra-endurance athlete Jonathan Goldberg in the late '80s under the trademarked name Spinning, was originally created to serve the winter training needs of cyclists and people looking for a non-impact cardiovascular alternative to the treadmill and elliptical machine.
So why all the fear?
Indoor cycling is mysterious; people don't have a lot of awareness about what exactly it entails. People think that because the exercise session is on a bike, it is only for fit people or elite cyclists, but that is not true.
Cycling is about attaining and achieving fitness, working at a good aerobic pace, not walking out and thinking, damn, that was so hard!
Even though cycling is classified as a group fitness class, participants control a session's intensity more than they do in step or aerobics classes that involve lots of choreography.
Classes typically last 50 minutes, cover 15 to 20 miles and burn 500 calories or more while engaging the major leg muscles and the core. By adjusting the resistance knob attached to the brake at the front of the bike, you can tailor the class to your fitness level or mimic climbing hills or sprinting on flat roads.
Your first and only goal was to stay on the bike
I offer the following tips for newcomers to indoor cycling:
- Get to class about 15 minutes early so the instructor can set you up on the bike, explain safety cues.
- Even though cycling is non-impact, you can injure your knees and back if you are not fitted properly. If the instructor does not give you special attention, leave and find another instructor.
- Bring a full water bottle, a towel and lightweight clothing. Avoid wearing long pants, especially those with flared legs that could get caught in the pedal spindles. Ordinary sneakers are fine.
- Don't feel compelled to keep up with the instructor or other participants. Use your first class to play around with the resistance and watch how the class is conducted.
Thanks Bill!!!
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